after reading a ... ... a....
self help book (yeah... really!), its occurred to me that I do not see myself as my own best friend.
In the past, this would sound really hokey to me, but I'm really starting to see the true importance of seeing myself as my own best friend, of being THERE for myself, not just shutting down and giving up on myself.. I've actually always been my own worst enemy.
this part in the above mentioned self help book, really got me :
"I believe that my higher self is my pure essence and highest potential, without all the layers of fear and ego that make up my outward personality. I think of her as my best friend, who's always there for me and never lets me down. It's this essence that can see situations from all sides with absolute clarity and without judgment."
so, I'm going to be going through this book, discriminately, because not all advice is good advice - but whatever feels right to me/works for me/is positive to me - I will try to internalize and hopefully radically change my pretty terrible point of view as it stands right now.
oh and I haven't started smoking again...
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